Some satirical perspective on the holidays, brought to you in the form of an excerpt from Mr. Stephen Colbert on his show last night:
I was so intrigued by an "info-graphic" in the 'Life' section of today's The USA Today. I found it very "info-mative." It says, "How far would you go to get the holiday toy your kid wants?" 62% said, "Save a little each month." 17% said, "Camp out all night at the store." 15% said they'd pay double the price. And 6% said they would knock someone over to grab the last item.
That is sad. I guess only 6% of parents really love their children.
This just goes to show you, folks...scrimp all you want, cut coupons from the Pennysaver, camp out, splurge--it don't matter! Because 6% of us good parents will kidney punch you, bring you the tire iron, and then pry the gift from your cold, thrifty hands. Merry Christmas--I will see you in hell!
And one of the reasons I love this season is because this is when consumers do God's work and put businesses back in the black. You see, I may be a Christian, but I'm also a capitalist, and I will defend our capitalist system against all enemies...
...Satirical (and hilarious), yet points to scary truths.
|The Colbert Report||Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c|
|How Far Good Parents Will Go|